Its been a while. A post from the heart

Hello 2013.
To state the obvious - i've not posted in a while. And to be honest its taking me a lot of effort to muster the energy and enthusiasm to post now despite wanting to for a while.
Those of you who know me personally and some of you who don't but would have already seen via my Facebook page, will be aware of the reasons why I haven't posted in a long time.
I 'm trying to get to the point but its quite hard to write about something thats so personal in a public domain. Okay lets get this over - i've been away for a while because my mum, who was diagnosed with cancer in August, had an operation in December and following a complication passed away on Boxing day.

So there it is. My world has changed and things won't ever be the same.

Everyday things get a little easier, and they say time is a great healer, but adapting is difficult, so i'm taking things one day at a time. I now feel it is time to try & get back into things but must confess i've felt a little uninspired since it happened, but perhaps thats to be expected.

Because of the events of the past month, my outlook on life has altered. My priorities have changed and a lot of things have been put into perspective. The main thing being that i've come to the stark realisation that spent far too much of my life caught up in the obsession of trying to make a career of being an illustrator. This has meant i've often neglected people close to me because i've put my work first........... no more.
Losing my mum has taught me that although I love drawing and desperately want to carve myself out a niche in the illustration industry I need to stop putting it at the forefront of my life.
So thanks mum for that valuable lesson and i'm sorry that i didn't spend more time with you in life.
But no regrets, I know she would not have wanted that.
I will still work at being an illustrator and continue drawing but from now on i'm not going to let it take over.

On a happier note I have a wedding to organise (my own). We decided as family that going ahead with it is what mum would want so this will be taking up a big part of my time. I'll try to post as often as possible but i'm no longer going to stress about posting regularly, so forgive me if from now on theres only a new post once a week.
Wedding plans here we come, and 'mum I know you'll be there in spirit'.